The Fall of 1969 was my first semester at UCLA, where I lived in an oncampus student dorm with Hennie, my sweet Jewish hippy roommate, and met up with both highschool buddies and new friends.
November 22, 1969 Friday/ Said goodbye to Steve? WOW 1969 Beautiful day!!! Got a letter from my brother Robert—Grek ((twirly loops)). Went with Steve to Bruin Ralley = Rachel Welch, chicken & coke cups (stacked) → Post Office. Rapped → Launi on Meyerhoff Park—he is so outasite. Started frisbeeing & bunch of people joined—later even Steve—sooo fun!! Jerry Kostenberg walked up!! Farout dude—he’s going to enroll→ Winter quarter. Went → Faber’s class & met Diane & Bobby & Sue Hanson. Nite = party → Noels ((in cloud of dots)). Danced at the Student Union to Pacoo—farout band. More of a concert, we didn’t dance so much. We walked back → party & met two guys. One is ++ intelligent, eyes intense, communicating with my mind. I went out for hamburgers & hot chocolate with JOHN.
Tonight I wrote a letter to Vip on purple gift wrapping wax-stamped with a band aid:
11/22/69 Dear Vip, It’s been two weeks since your last letter, and that is time too full to pretend it isn’t there, so I’m writing…totally out of stationary. I wonder why it’s called that?
Wow—I’ve been having such a beautiful time! How do describe the sky? Every cloud is different and casts it’s own shadow….going nowhere in particular…but even the wisp of a cloud alone in sky is beautiful because of its loneliness (ramble ramble!). People are coming and going and its raining and everything is growing….beauteous!
I carravaned to the Frisco Peace March and had one of the most fantastic experiences of my life. Singing “America the Beautiful,” we walked to Golden State Park and everyone was hugging everyone and running in giant circles and Frisbee-throwing coffee lids in the air. Really wish you could have been there. We communed in Berkeley for three days—that town has an unbelievably gentle free atmosphere.
I love your letters, Vip. No, I love you. Your letters are the only ones I get that I’m really able to feel into. I hope your “creative intelligence” continues to double. I hope your sister is in perfect health. I hope your strange old man dies in peace and that you are happy and strong enough to understand the mind’s imaginings.
Love, Nancy 69 (two-fish Pisces sign)
P.S. Thank you for your postcard. And don’t worry about the movie—just look out your window at the world flicking by.
Author's note: Twenty-seven years later this gentleman and I were married, engaged by a Hukam from the Siri Guru Granth Sahib which read, "You are betrothed to your childhood friend."
UCLA Winter Break at Home
December 26,1969 1969 DD ((Dear Diary)) Everyday seems a
memoranda. Drove around applying (?) for summer jobs too early. Home—started a
blouse but there wasn’t enuf material.
Vip called & came
over later with his two sisters. Sue is about 21 & a really
beautiful person. Vip wanted her to read my palm to see if I had any
witch signs (a good thing). They all came & sat in my room about
five minutes then had to go. I really felt dumb not being what they
thought—but if that’s what I seem to be and I’m not then what am I
really? Maybe you don’t need the sign to be mystic or whatever it is.
Wow—confusion.
Nite: I went → a show with Corinne & her friends Leslie & Laurie cuz they needed a ride. Locked keys in the car.
December 27th SAD1969DD
I will never be what I want or even try to be. I will only be who I am.
I don’t think this diary speaks very well. Words are a tyranny in a
way. I introspect over things I’ve heard and said and my introgressions
lead to my depression—which I do not consciously desire. Yet my total
consciousness seems to demand introgressions and in the same way my
imaginings are my escape. I realize it is possible for me to see my own
reality only and I can change it & try to make it more real but it
will never suffice for another.
Nite: out with Jim T. ((sign of Pisces)) Movie ((sign of Cancer)).
