Towards the end of my second marriage I took a Hukum from the Siri Guru Granth Sahib to see what the Guru had in store for me. It appeared to be a very long Hukam! I almost went on to find a short one but held on, feeling compelled to read and accept whatever Guru chose to give me. Not until the very end was the message clear--Guru saying I am betrothed to my childhood friend! The Lavan, or Wedding Song, immediately followed. Wahe Guru!
Our Betrothal Hukam Siri Guru Granth Sahib page 773
Raag Soohee, Fourth Guru, Chhant, First House:
One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:
If only I could meet the True Guru, the Primal Being. Discarding my faults and sins, I would chant the Lord's Glorious Praises. I meditate on the Naam, the Name of the Lord, Har, Har. Continuously, continually, I chant the Word of the Guru's Bani.
Gurbani always seems so sweet; I have eradicated the sins from within. The disease of egotism is gone, fear has left, and I am absorbed in celestial peace. Through
the Word of the Guru's Shabad, the bed of my body has become cozy and
beautiful, and I enjoy the essence of spiritual wisdom. Night and day, I continually enjoy peace and pleasure. O Nanak, this is my pre-ordained destiny. ||1||
The
soul-bride is lovingly embellished with truth and contentment; her
Father, the Guru, has come to engage her in marriage to her Husband
Lord. Joining with the humble Saints, I sing Gurbani. Singing the Guru's Bani, I have obtained the supreme status; meeting with the Saints, the self-elect, I am blessed and adorned.
Anger and attachment have left my body and run away; I have eradicated hypocrisy and doubt. The pain of egotism is gone, and I have found peace; my body has become healthy and free of disease. By Guru's Grace, O Nanak, I have realized God, the ocean of virtue. ||2||
The self-willed manmukh is separated, far away from God; she does not obtain the Mansion of His Presence, and she burns. Egotism and falsehood are deep within her; deluded by falsehood, she deals only in falsehood. Practicing fraud and falsehood, she suffers terrible pain; without the True Guru, she does not find the way. The foolish soul-bride wanders along dismal pathways; each and every moment, she is bumped and pushed.
God, the Great Giver, shows His Mercy, and leads her to meet the True Guru, the Primal Being. Those beings who have been separated for countless incarnations, O Nanak, are reunited with the Lord, with intuitive ease. ||3||
Calculating the most auspicious moment, the Lord comes into the bride's home; her heart is filled with ecstasy. The Pandits and astrologers have come, to sit and consult the almanacs. They
have consulted the almanacs, and the bride's mind vibrates with bliss,
when she hears that her Friend is coming into the home of her heart. The virtuous and wise men sat down and decided to perform the marriage immediately.
She
has found her Husband, the Inaccessible, Unfathomable Primal Lord, who
is forever young; He is her Best Friend from her earliest childhood. O Nanak, he has mercifully united the bride with Himself. She shall never be separated again. ||4||1||
That summer I went to the Solstice celebration in New Mexico, where I
was put in contact with my friend through a Sikh who had gone to
college with him. It was Vip—the school mate I had made a video with
our senior year. She said Vip had been looking for me for twenty-seven years.
Hmmmm! When I got back to Los Angeles I called Vip up to talk.
We filled each other in on those missing years. Vip had been active in
the anti-nuclear movement, was party to blocking coastal trains
carrying nuclear waste disguised as cargo, and had taught
Gandhian-style protest techniques to auditoriums of a thousand people. He trained them how to illegally enter a nuclear test site with the
selfless purpose of bringing media attention to the site’s grave
problems.
He sounded like a warrior-saint to me!
Vip decided to visit the Sikh community and see how it felt. We met
with Yogiji, who told Vip that he was already spiritual and did not
need a spiritual path. He gave him the name, “Waheguru Singh” and
taught him how to chant it silently for the maximum effect. And finally
Yogiji told me that Waheguru Singh was God’s gift to me.
I was in
bliss, feeling guided by my life experience, by my beloved Guru and my
earthly spiritual teacher to this one man. Guru Singh and Premka Kaur
married us at a Summer Solstice gathering, amidst pouring rain, thunder
and lightening.
That marriage was filled with earthly joys, starting with my first and
only bridal shower, wonderful friendships and loving service to the community, amidst a home life rift
with pouring tears, thundering swearing and sudden flare-ups. “So this
is what it is like to live as a regular person?" I wondered.
