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| The Golden Temple of Amritsar |
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My first glimpse of the Golden Temple of Amritsar was from a taxicab window. As we passed by this Jewel of God, the Heart of Mother Earth, on the way to Mata Ganga Niwas, I felt, “I am finally here. I am Home.”
The impact of seeing and feeling the blessing of the Golden Temple’s darshan consecrated my union with the Guru into everlasting bliss. The golden acknowledgement went deep into my soul, having chanted “I am you, you are me” and “Ek Ong Kaar, Sat Gurprasad, Sat Gurprasad, Ek Ong Kaar” on my breath throughout my flight, knowing oneness with every breath.
Mata Ganga Niwas is a dwelling place for pilgrims to the Golden Temple, named after Mata Ganga, Guru Arjan’s wife. Making myself at home, at midnight, on March 6th, I lit my birthday candle, which slowly burned to its natural end over the course of five days. So did my fifty-fifth year begin, symbolically bringing in Light, rather than blowing it out.
Fifty-five. Fifth Guru!
My Guru-guided intention was to spend my first three days in Amritsar meditating at the Golden Temple. I was prepared to spend the night, meditate and take a dip each day, but wondered, are there any public bathrooms? That question was never answered. The reality was much more relaxed, with returns to the Niwas to sleep and refresh myself with personal routines.
I arrived at the Golden Temple at 2:15am. Ishnaan Sewa was still in process. They were washing the floors of the inner sanctum with milk, cleaning and polishing every article of faith. I started down the side entrance to the Temple’s long walkway, hoping to enter, but the sevadar on guard gallantly blocked my way, “No Women!”
I implored, “What if I am Mata Ganga, and this is Guru Arjan’s, my husband’s, house—if Mata Ganga came to clean her house, what would you say?”—“No!” “Who are you to say ‘No!’ to Mata Ganga?” In answer, he gave me his name!
It was all in fun, ambrosial waters lapping against the walkway. Buckets full of this Amrit are poured on the inner sanctum’s marble to wash away the sacred milk. It is then towel dried with love.
I am the Milk, I am the Amrit, I am the Towel that dries all women’s tears.
At the Golden Temple’s main Gateway, a cozy crowd had gathered. Men sat on the left, women on the right, chanting Sukhmani Sahib, Guru Arjan Dev ji's Psalm of Peace. I sat next to a gentle woman named Jaswinder Kaur and read along, joining the group’s beautifully elevated spirit, all tinged with great expectancy. Then, suddenly, at 3:30am, everyone scrambled to their feet and made a joyful rush on the door! It opened to the Golden Temple Jewel before us.
I entered the Temple by the narrow center lane to the right side entrance, wherein I found the best place in the world to sit and engage in Gurbani Kirtan, by the rail of this inner sanctum. I stood or sat wherever I was able, and gradually worked my way closer to the Guru as people got up to leave. Smiling, shiny-eyed women made room for me, somehow knowing it was my first time.
Every morning I had access to privileged spots, my favorite—beside the Guru, or near the flower man who help’s with Guru’s Flowers.
Jaswinder Kaur connected with me very purely, often plopping down right next to me, in someone’s lap! Her English was better than most, so that first morning together we were able to discuss what was happening around us. I was trying to understand why the Siri Guru Granth Sahibji was not in the Golden Temple, why everyone came in and bowed reverently to an empty throne. Guru is the sound current of the Siri Guru Granth Sahib that we knew, and Shabads from Guruji are played continuously all day. Yet from the time the high gates open to the time the Siri Guru Granth Sahibji regally arrives from its resting place at the Akal Takhat, hours pass of bowing to Gurbani Kirtan, songs from the formless Guru. Neither of us could understand why such a lapse of time took place.
Then I realized that Guruji does come in on time, by Guru’s schedule. Guru deeply meditates to heal the world while in Sukhasan. He does not really sleep. Our longing to see the Guru increases until a natural hour for Guruji to be carried with great love and reverence from his Akal Takhat sanctuary to speak to us in the Golden Temple, where his presence is profoundly honored, loved and bliss bestowing.
Initially my attention drifted due to the intensity of the experience, lack of sleep, lack of water, or all of these. I moved my body in soothing circles with the music, lulling my mind. Then, catching myself, would sit very still for a few moments before circling again. My energy was replenished by a retreat to the Lungar Hall for Guru ka Lungar, where I enjoyed a simple, wholesome meal. For the first three days this and Gurbani Kirtan were my only sustenance.
I took my first dip in the Harimander that day. Men are allowed to bathe all along the Parkarma, the outer walkway around the tank. Women have the privacy of a bathhouse, where I was able to gracefully disrobe to any degree I wished and hang my clothes.
First, I imagined ethereal Golden Temple Amrit Nectar shining all over my skin, then I stepped happily into the actual Amrit waters, held on to a big ring at the end of a thick chain, and began dunking my whole body, head and all, one hundred and eight times, just as Yogiji had suggested we do. Unmindful of the stares of others, I did them fast, breathing, gasping for air, water dripping from my mouth and nose. Wahe Guru Wahe Guru Wahe Guru! Such enlivening bliss! Merging the realms!
Other women were politely splashing their faces. I wondered—does it give them an inkling of the blessings of this Amrit on their crown, the tenth gate?
On returning to the Golden Temple’s inner chambers, I climbed the steps to the second floor where I found a ledge stacked with colorful Nitnems. Borrowing one, I settled into a peaceful niche overlooking the Guru’s court, a mosaic of flower garlands, to read the morning prayers. I then climbed a golden-lined stairway to the rooftop where I found a sacred circular clearing to pray for my daughter, in the center of a faded but ornate mandala. Here I dwelt in a vast bliss as never before imagined, all divine entities readily accessible. As each Guru’s multi-dimensional spiritual presence exponentially expanded into the universe, their love flowed back through my heart, beaming healing love to Adi Shakti Kaur and radiating power, peace and love to the world.
I returned to sit by the Guru behind the low brass rail, where I meditated and spread my awareness into the sacred space crystal clear into the evening, leaving only to drink a bowl of Amrit water along the Parkarma.
I did not know there was a deck for this purpose on the Choti Parkarma.
When I returned, Rehiras, the evening prayer, was being recited. I climbed steps to the second floor to recite it from the beginning and completed it on my own. Following Rehiras, the Gurbani Kirtan became so powerful and engaging, all my senses were awakened to Guru’s shining presence.
From that moment on, I opened myself to see the Guru as though he would appear effortlessly out of the highly charged air. A kind Sikh got my attention, to apologize for bothering me, and a thoughtful Sevadar offered me chai along the Parkarma walkway as I headed toward Mata Ganga Niwas. Guru was in all with his love.
With this thought ended my Golden Temple birthday, a microcosm of the coming year.
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